Going to the movies – a general trauma

08.10.2006Osebno

So we went. It was the only movie worth seeing and we thought we`d give it a go.

The ride

First, we had to drove there. Apparently, yesterday was a “Drive 30 km per hour!” day, since everybody was doing exactly that. Never mind the road signs, we`re going for safety here. It felt like the Flintstones. Yabadabadoo! Erm..not.

Eventhough it was Saturday, we still managed to pick up numerous Sunday drivers along the way. You know, people who get their car out every full moon and think they fucking know how to drive. Well, they do know…how to drive very slowly and then crossing the red light at the intersection.

The shop

Having zero free time over the week, due to studies and a job, means you have to shop on Saturdays. Another fun experience. Let me ask you something…why is it that the longest queue is at the express lane? Isn`t that a little contradictory to the term itself? Anyway, we managed to get it all. Expired card, “no change but wait I think if I can dig deep into my pants for five minutes I`ll be able to find those five tollars, nope sorry, no change, you`ll just have to break a fifty” event, screaming kids, heat and stench and every other fun stuff you see when walking into a mall.

The theatre

Sitting between teenagers who try to guess the title of every trailer and getting half of them wrong and smelling a god awful perfume on a lady who is dressed to kill (literally, if the perfume does not get you, the huge coat will) and is making loud comments about the ingenious invention that is a cup-holder (jesus lady, when was the last time YOU were in a theatre). Maybe the architechs should start thinking of a new feature – solo cinema booths. Think about you…people pay to see a movie, not to hear or smell or feel other viewers (most of them, at least). So why not install some odor-free, touch-free, sound-isolated booths and charge extra. It`s a win-win situation!

At least the movie was worth the trouble.