I guess we sailed into the deep netherworlds of the memory and soul.
This is where the dreams are born, this is where the nightmares show their claws and this is where the crying and the laughing comes from. I don`t know exactly why I chose to come here today, what makes this day so special and unique, but I guess you can always go there, sink deep inside and ponder the questions with no real answers. If it bears no answer, is it really a question?
Maybe it`s because I had sausage for breakfast. Maybe it`s because I feel tired, cause I carried five case logic`s filled with cds to work. Maybe I just overburnt myself a little too much over the past few days and now I feel blue cause of the lack of positive energy.
Nothing changed. People are still the same, the world hasn`t changed a bit, I still feel loved by her (and with every day passing that love grows) and yet, somewhere deep inside of me, this blue feeling arises every once in a while. Nothing big when looked from the distance, but I guess the question of focus is everything anyway.
We are all prisoners of our memories. Memories are our past life. And sometimes, we would be better off without them. We would be better off just living our life instead of living it and at the same time carrying with us this huge memory luggage.
I sometimes get so scared that the world is gonna run away from me that I cannot breathe. That the world and everybody I know and care for and love is gonna disappear and I`ll be left alone. In the dark.
And then I shift focus. And calm myself down. And see the truth again. The matrix behind the blinds. And the world is OK again.