To answer your “why”…


Sex blogs are the most boring blogs of them all. Seriously, personal blogs are boring, but sex blogs take the cake, the candle and all the presents when it comes to boring the reader. Sure, they are kinky and exciting in the beginning, but let`s get real here…we only have three holes and we mostly use two. So there`s not much of a variety. I`m not saying, if we were to be from Andromeda or some other far away place in the galaxy where we would have the luxury of being in a possesion of multiple holes and other tentacles, we could make the sex talk (not to mention sex on its own) more interesting.

That is why I find sex blogs either very repetative (we all know how it ends, right?) or very shallow. All image, no content. On the other hand, sex is all about content, and there isn`t much of an image.

By writing “Let`s see how long she`ll last“, I was reffering to the fact that either a) you`ll get bored by it and stop writing about your sex-escapades, or b) you`ll turn into a boring drivel about sex and reheating same ol patterns over and over and over again. Like him.

Either way, it may be interesting and exciting for you, but it`s boring and unimaginative for me. But please…prove me wrong.


31 komentarjev na “To answer your “why”…

  1. psYhichka

    You most certainly are entitled to your own opinion and I most certainly have nothing to prove to you or anybody else.

    It’s not really my fault your sex life is boring, neither is my fault that my blog bores you. You are the one reading it.

    Lack of imagination is something that sticks out of your blog. But again, that is also my own opinion.

    And another thing. Sex is not about holes, darlin’. At least think about that.

  2. Domen

    You see, you completely misunderstood me. And you went and concluded that my sex life is boring, since I find reading about your sex life a drag. But it`s ok…how could you know, right?

    I find your blog immature and naive. At the same time, it`s quite boring because it does not get to the point. It has no structure and conclusion. A lot of tease, none of the satisfaction. Is your sex life also like that? Full of imagination, none of realisation?

    I am completely aware of the fact that there is more to sex than just filling up holes. I think that is the main reason I am enjoying it so much and at the same time have no inclination of explaining it to others. Cause seriously…it`s none of your business. And what would be the benefits if you knew? I`d only make you jelaous. Mostly because imagination is not my primary drive when sex is the issue. It`s pleasure. Mutual satisfaction. Ecstasy. Fantasy is for kids. For people who do not dare to act on an impulse. Sounds familiar?

    And baby…nobody is blaming you of anything. Do people often blame you for things? Is that what your life is like? Guilt and tease?

    However, you are right. You write it, I do not have to read it. But I do. Cause I am curious. It`s in my nature. Who knows, maybe I`ll learn something from it some day. So far, no such luck.

  3. psYhichka

    I don’t think I misunderstood anything. Next time put a little more thought in how you put down your words and maybe you won’t have to drag yourself out of something you put yourself in to.

    My conclusion on your boring sex life was based on your sentances. You are the one saying that sex blogs are boring because we only have 3 or 2 holes to fill and that there is not much of a variety. I appologise if my looks on sex are different. If we can have an interresting sex we can surely write about it in an interresting way.

    But that’s another story. As I said, you can think whatever you want about my blog. But please don’t tell me what to write. My topics are sex related, I agree. But why on earth should I describe exactly how my sex act looks like? I like it better if I leave a bit of open space for my readers imagination. Would you feel better if I wrote how he came all over my face? Cause I simply don’t feel the need to.

    And please tell me who am I supposed to satisfy? You? Ask your girlfriend, darling, or try 090 number. Cause I have different plans with my writings.

    You are kind of funny. But I’m not a jelous person. If you are enjoying your sex life like you say, I really am happy for you. If you are writing about it or not is really not my thing to say. Will leave that choice to you.

    You wanna know what my life is like? Why? You already wrote what you think it’s like. Why are you asking now? You made yourself a judge. You think you know me. But you keep forgetting that this is web. Am I real or am I fake? See, this is where imagination steps in.

    And for learning something new you first have to open your mind. Try it.

  4. Bo


    I find your so-called sex impressions mediocre or even dull. But nobody should tell you what to write. If I got a kick out of what you are publishing, I would publish it. And I am sure I would probably get better, for the others too.

    People who criticized you didn’t mean anything mean, don’t you think so. So there’s no need for you to get defensive.

  5. Domen

    You need to learn how to lead a debate. And how not to get personal every time somebody remarks that in his/hers opinion your writing sucks. And then, be offended if the person gets down on your level of debating.

    But it`s ok, you are only showing that your ego is still in its infantile state. Nothing wrong with that. Just as long you are aware of it. It`s normal and you are not alone. People share something with the rest, they want positive feedback. Things to make them go. Something to confirm the quality of their actions. Sharing something also means exposing one`s ego to the public. It takes a while for an ego to adapt to negative criticism as well. And as many other things in life…it`ll grow. And harden.

  6. psyhichka

    I would, but it’s not my debate to lead. You started it. If you don’t remember how, please check again. My answer to you was as personal as your comments on me. Simply based on something you wrote without knowing a single thing about you. But that’s usually a weapon you use, right?

    I don’t mind the criticism. I expected it. I asked you ‘why’ when you made your first remark about my blog. And I did that knowing your remark is full of sarcasm. Therefor I pretty much knew what you will write.

    I can accept all the things you wrote about me and my blog. But still I don’t understand why reading it than. You’re curious? Fine, but I guess you’re not reading every single blog. Is there any other reason maybe?

    It’s interresting that you think I’m being offended. Why? You wanted to offend me? Well you will have to do better than that. I explained all of my remarks in a proper way which is more than I can say for you.

    Let me thank you for all the supporting words you wrote. I hope they will help me and my ego to blossom in a better way. I hope we will grow in a way that suits you. Cause that’s really the main reason I started to write a blog. Of caurse I will do my best to get your confirmation. What else could be the point of my life? 😉

    Seriously, you do your thing and I’ll do mine. This debate could go on forever and at some point we could really get offensive. Well I don’t feel the need for that neither.

    I know what you think and you know what I think. Let’s leave it here cause most probably we will never agree.

    What do you think?

    Oh, I almost forgot about Bo:

    Thank you. And please try not to speak for others if you don’t know really what their thoughts were. Thank you again.


    Thank you, too. I will never forget you. 😉

  7. Domen

    Since I am deep in blog-researching, the answer to your question whether or not I read every blog out there is yes. Let me correct myself…I do read every blog, registered on the si.blogs portal. Simply because that way, I can get a some-what of a bigger picture of the slovene blogosphere. So please, don`t flatter yourself. Your blog is not special. You are not special. At least…not to me. To me, you are a mere statistic. A number. A piece of the puzzle.

    You are still thinking that I want you to dance my way. In fact, I do not care about your dance. I have no incling of teaching you how to dance, how to be a great dancer and how to dazzle the audience. I would not teach you even if you asked. However, I now start to wonder, why is that? I won`t judge you, but I find it amusing. You claim that your blog is hush-hush. Aren`t you allowed to talk about stuff your blog about in your part of the society?

    Another interesting point. You claim you do not care about my comments, yet you get down dirty and personal the second the egg strikes the statue. Why make remarks on my personal sex life, if I was talking about something completely different? Is that how you usually defend yourself? By bluffing?

    It was also never an issue of agreeing with me. The original remark was mine and mine alone. You responded. Thinking I wan to establish a communication. I only offered further explanation because I wanted to elaborate my original comment. Why on earth would I want to agree with you? Upon what exactly?

    Interesting points do not stop there. If you knew what I was going to say, if you anticipated my steps, why offer such puny and boring response? Why not, shall we say, spice it up? Is that because…you are unable to do it?

    But be it as you wish. After all, you need that feeling of things happening your way, don`t you? And who am I to stomp on your precious feelings?

  8. psyhichka

    My mistake. If you are reading every single blog I appologise. Just a quick thought. Do you always have such long conversations with pieces of puzzle? 🙂

    I claim that my blog is hush-hush? I claim that you can not know if I’ real or fake. My society knows who I am and what kind of blog (or maybe blogs) I write. I chose not to share my identity with the whole web society but my e-mail is public and everyone who wants to know more is welcome to write. And they do.

    Your personal sex life is not an issue here. I already explained how I came to that conclusion in my second comment (paragraph no. 2). Scroll down to paragraph no. 5 (same comment) and you will notice that I was even happy for you when you claimed that your sex life is great. And dirty? Where on earth did you find that? I wasn’t bluffing. It seems to me that you were.

    “…we only have three holes and we mostly use two. So there`s not much of a variety.”

    You wrote this, not me.

    “Next time put a little more thought in how you put down your words and maybe you won’t have to drag yourself out of something you put yourself in to.”

    And this is mine. Felt like using it again.

    Further, I’m not looking for your approval. I just asked a simple question and you answered. Guilt for debate that followed is pretty much mutual.

    My response. 🙂 I think it did the trick. Spicey or not.

    Anyway, thanks for everything. After all you did me a favour. Advertising is usually not this cheap. 🙂

    p.s. Yes, I like that feeling. Don’t you?

  9. jaKa

    Well, let me reiterate what I’ve said at numerous similar occasions. I apologize for an intrusion of slovene amidst all this poor english, but what I intend to say now does not really sound that good in any other language:

    cookie, ti si kmet!

    Even if psyhicka’s content is – yes, I have to agree with Bo on that one! – mediocre and rather dull, and her style reminds me of high school days, I believe there are people that are attracted by her writing. It’s good that they have a post or two a day they enjoy, isn’t it? De gustibus non est disputandum, right, cookie?

    There’s also the indisputable fact that, as my favourite lesbian already noted, sex sells. Let’s ignore the question what’s being sold here…

    To me, you are a mere statistic. A number. A piece of the puzzle, boy, does that sound cool. The cold, objective scientist that our cookie is. Let me stress something regarding your deep research, cookie: blogs (and many other similar communication media enabled by the omnipresence of the web) have actually been getting quite a lot of attention from researchers. So excuse me for being slightly sceptical about what novelties a journalism undergrad from FDV can provide. I don’t claim you can’t, I just want to note that after all this time of your blog research, I still fail to come up with any serious publication on this topic that would be (at least co-)authored by yourself: can you give us a hint?

    And now, although (almost) completely off-topic, I have to scream, I apologize once again, for fuck’s sake, where’d you get the idea that fuck is all about holes?! If that’s really how you feel, then I suggest you go ahead and grow a few tentacles, consider giving Baya a few extra holes for her birthday: both biotech and plastic surgery can do wonders today…

    Sheeesh… seriously, do you really have to be that assertive? I don’t go around annoying people who have forgotten how to derive, who can’t do integration per-partes anymore, or have no clue about combinatorics. Can’t you just let people be? Remember my all-time favourite Jack in Mars Attacks!: Little people, why can’t we all just… get along?

  10. Bo


    Your last comment, paragraph #5.
    People love their hobbies. Even if cookie doesn’t publish his research that doesn’t mean he can’t discover America for himself and be happy and … it feels to me that you got into a little contradiction with the last thought borrowed from Jack from Mars Attacks!
    (But that’s my hobby now, being meticulous.)

    And well, I am positive we two could agree on a number of things, on Jack for one thing!

  11. Bo

    I’ve never felt that cookie was harsh with psyhichka, sooner the other way around (with no solid ground whatsoever).

    Still a lot to learn, children, c’mon, spread to your classrooms.

  12. psyhichka

    Oh come on Bo, the other way around? We both had our momemnts I think. But I’m not as new here as you think. Cookie certainly has a way of ‘being smart’ all over the blogosfere.

    I have no idea what kind of research he’s doing but I’m sure it doesn’t include calling other peoples blog no good all the time.

    Yes it’s a good thing to have an opinion but he’s going a bit to far with his. It’s just a metter of time when everything comes crashing back in.

    Already in my sit. 😉

  13. jaKa

    well, dearest Bo, one of the absolutely necessary ingredients of each pot that has some research boiling in it is peer review. it’s not publishing per-se, it’s the feedback you get from exposing your work to your peers that finally affirms or rejects your theses.

    anything cookie does in the darkness of his room and keeps to himself or rambles about to laymen is not scientific research, whereas I do think that our dearest L-filer tends to perceive his occupation with blogs as precisely that. right, cookie?

    let me give you an example: cookie asks himself how long psYhichka will last and later tells us that sex blogs do not last long because they are boring. he goes even further and limits the future of the blog to only two possible paths that the writer is bound to take. well, that might be his observation, but it does not constitute a valid theory any more than me claiming that lions are tame and slow creatures, because my experience with lions in zoos suggest this.

    now, I do not have a problem with cookie stating what he stated, if he acknowledges that this statement of his is no more than (at best) an educated guess. but no, he is being so assertive, so damn patronizing and exclusive, behaving like he knows it all when it comes to blogs, using terms like deep research… well, hell, if he wants to do that, then there’s first some serious research to be done, some numbers to be gathered, and loads of statistics to be applied to these numbers. anyone can read all blogs on si.blogs list, but extracting and deriving knowledge from that reading takes much more!

    oh, and sorry for writing ybout you, cookie, in thrid person on your own blog. it seems so strange… 😉

  14. Domen

    Jaka, I agree. Although on the field of the web and social networking, I do not think that the key lies in statistics. I think it is more of content analysis. Quality over quantity data.

    My primary research method is observation with participation. For numeral statistics, my mecca is technorati with their state of the blogosphere series. For quality research, the platform is siblogs. I am aware of the fact that the platform is neither perfect nor does it goes deep (what is the depth of the web anyway?), but that is all we have right now. My primary interest is in the slovene part of the blogosphere. And besides reading not only every blog on si.blogs (usually I check the site three times a day, reading the first ten most recently updated blogs) I am also constantly monitoring vecer and delo blogs. Although I am not reading every single blog that can be found through these three main gateways, I think that I have a pretty good oversight of the situation.

    That said, I think that the claim “it`s all about them numrebs” is slightly irrelevant as the numbers does not tell the story. The content does. Even link monitoring does not provide the right amount of content for analysis.

    A theory? Blogs do not need a theory of their own. The science of public opinion is full of examples where it would seem the authors had blogs on their mind when they wrote them. Dewey, Lippmann, Tonnies to name some were thinking about the prefect society, one where every opinion can be published, reflected upon, where every person has its own say and where everything is happening with almost-real-time speed. So it is my thesis that blogs do not need a new theoretical concept but rather they need to be situated in the existing theories. They need to be checked against the previous tries in describing the perfect society and see if they match the case.

    And finally…the matter of paths a blogger can take. Sadly (or fortunately) people are not as creative as one would think. They tend to use patterns, styles that impress them or feel right to them. It`s nothing wrong with that, it`s just that we are narrowing our own possibilities. Blog-styles are not a sole example of that. The limits of my language mean the limits of my world…

    As for my way of being assertive and supposedly cruel to people…I stand behind things I believe in. And I display my beliefs whenever and wherever I think the display would be most effective. However, I am but a man. But if you cannot trust yourself…who will you trust?

  15. alternativka

    Cookie, that kinda research would take quite some of your time and would therefore have to be jor job. Unless of course you are totally rich and can spend all your time on the internet, checking the content of slovenian blogs…

    I really have a hard time believing that this facts are so important that someone would actually pay money to get them.

  16. Domen

    @alternativka – i am not claiming to discover everything there is to discover and put every sociology scientist out of business when I publish something. All I am trying to do is get the ball rolling in the slovene part of the blogosphere. Something that would change the mind of people who claim that blogs will devolve and that web-based forums will take over. Something that would make the people see the meaning of blogs and why they aren`t just identity makers. You know…my 2 cents.

    And as for “that kind of research”..I`ve been doing it for the last two years.

  17. alternativka

    “that would make the people see the meaning of blogs and why they aren`t just identity makers.. “

    O, you’re too late for that – if you spent more time on google looking 4 articles & researches on this topic, you’d see it’s all been done already 😉

    No dashing discoveries here…

  18. Domen

    @alternativka – I am not claiming to be the first on the moon. All I am saying that in our media space, you have people who compare blogs to forums and are making such silly remarks about them that one could not believe how the hell did they got a doctorate out of communication sciences.

    @okapi – agreed. Almost as monstrous as posting meaningless anonymous comments on someone`s blog.

  19. alternativka

    The bitter truth is, you can compare blogs to whatever you want – even forums. Caus they both are just different kinds of internet communities. I am not saying they are the same, but it’s not much difference really. Surely you can find some features, that differ, but still…

    I mean we’re not talking about comparing guns and teddy bears. I would understand if you were talking about corpo blogs, but you’re not really.

    As about the PhD – that’s the beauty of it. Whatever you say after you got one is pure science 😉

  20. domen

    You can compare, but the comparison does not need to hold. And since blogs and the mighty blogosphere is so much than a few examples of isolated forums with 10+ users, I think somebody has to say and prove that. Am I the one?

    LOL@guns and teddy bears. I agree. We are comparing two similar things. But the small differences make all the…hm…difference.

    And as for the beauty of PhD – sad but true. That`s why I want one 😀

  21. alternativka

    I am sorry to dissapoint you but forums are far from 10 + users. In any case, if you want to differ them from blogs, you’ll have to dive into forums aswell. And here is an example of very live and forum, that outdoes blog big time.

    The only reason why I’d get PhD is so I’d be able to say: “I’m a doctor, you can take your clothes off :D”

  22. Domen

    Your link is broken.

    And concerning forums vs. blogs, forums never had the kind of power blog(osphere) has. Politically speaking. Forums are fine and dandy, but they do not lead into collective actions. Forum (most of the time) do not link one another. Sure, you have lots of people participating in them, but in my opinion (as everything else written here), forums just don`t pack punch big enough compared to blogs. Name three examples where the forums did have the same effect as the blogs, which overturned politicians, caused a ban of a certain product or won the war.

  23. alternativka


    I am sure you realise that studying blogs and comparing them to forums means also studying and analysing forums. In any case it is still nonsence to compare them the way you do, as it is logical blogs are newer “development”. Saying they have more influence than forums is claiming car is better than bike – when we all know we use them both for different the same purpose (although they’re both means of travelling). Beacuse in that case it is so obvious you’d travel faster by car, but why bother to proove the obvious? It is not the intention of science…

    Now would you be so kind as to give 5 examples of blogs in Slovenia (well, that’s the one you study, right?) that overturned politicians, caused a ban of certain product or won the war. In Slovenia that is

  24. Domen

    You cannot limit blogs and forums to just one country. And since blogs are newer to forums, I think their time in Slovenia is yet to come. But for an interesting blog that has the potential to overturn politicians, see Mežica.

    Another aspect of blogs having a greater influence than forums is the author-based approach the blogs are taking. Forum is great for debates, but the culture of the participants is usually very low. And as soon as one participant is violating the rules, the whole forum gets a bad rep. Of course, you can moderate it and keep the cultural level high, but that does not happen very often.

    Another point…your examples have nothing to do with collective actions. Or if they do, I am not seeing it. And if we move away from Slovenia a little, the blogosphere is full of collective action examples. The G8 protests, the live aid support, overturning politicias in the USA, where bloggers are well-connected…

  25. alternativka

    Pardon my french but: You are so full of bullshit
    “…is usually very low”…”but that does not happen very often.”

    Don’t you think you are generalizing just a bit too much to call it a scientific research? If you didn’t back this up with a bit more than just few fancy numbers I must seriously doubt in the methodology you use….

    “Another point…your examples have nothing to do with collective actions. ” -Of course you’re not seing it, because you probably didn’t even take enough time to look through them. And that is not really a qualitative research, when you’re interestind only in one side and avoid getting deeper into the other, ’cause you are so eager to proove your point.

    And if we really move away from Slovenia as you said – you’ll say that what you are “researching” right now has been found out about couple of years ago.

    So, back to the beginning, aren’t we ;)? And since I also happen to think this debate has lost its ability to be constructive- I’m turning back to my books and leave you with your blog and research to continue this on your own.


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